Vulnerable, Anxious, Sad? | Tanvii.com - Indian Fashion, Lifestyle and Travel Blog

Vulnerable, Anxious, Sad?

Kate Pants Tanvii.com
“We’ve got to live, no matter how many skies have fallen.” – D. H. Lawrence

We have never seen a vulnerable side of you ... Do you get anxious, sad, etc.?

Last week I was having a tete-a-tete with my readers on Insta-Stories and one of them asked me the above question. I guess I was in one of those moods that I started typing and then went on and on and on ... Hence, this blog post because if I am gonna type something which is three paragraphs long, it is going on the blog. Period. 

So to answer the question, I would describe myself as a reticent person. Especially when it comes to expressing emotions. I am never excessively happy or sad. I do get anxious, and sad and upset and scared and whole rainbow of emotions but I rarely ever show or share them. The only people who would tap on my energy would be the ones living with me. And even with them I would exist in my truth (aka upset or unhappy) but might not necessarily choose to share. I am just not a sharer. 

Whenever I am not feeling myself or am upset I tend to retract from the world. I become a bum, indulge in binge-eating, trash-tv-watching or cooking. Cooking really calms when when I am not feeling myself. I always choose to live through my feelings, figure out why I am feeling the way I am feeling, what can I do to change my situation and then I make peace with whatever it is that is bothering me. 

I am not someone who wallows in any one emotion for too long. I don't tend to have conversations about my feelings while I am going through them. It never works out for me. Talking about unpleasant things or emotions makes me feel worse and not better. When I talk about stuff before I have had a chance to process it myself, it becomes all consuming from inside-out and and floats over my head. It feels like the words have contaminated the air and now there is no scope to breathe. I lose clarity of my own thoughts if someone else's opinions are added to the muddle of my emotions. Even if it takes a while I prefer to just be on my own. That is just how I deal with unpleasant emotions.


Very early on in my life I had realized that no one can console me or make me feel better about any situation. I usually have to do that for myself. I am analytical and pragmatic so if something doesn’t make logical sense to me then I don’t tend to waste much of my time on it. One of the tools I use is to write down what is bothering me. There is something about seeing words outside my head that I can figure them out better. I try and live in the moment and work through my thoughts on my own. I guess that's why no one sees my vulnerable side.

Kate Pants Tanvii.com
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18 comments

  1. I can relate to a lot of what you are saying. I usually have to work out my own issues as well.

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  2. First off, I love these pants! Love.

    Second, I get the question. When I started reading your blog, I formed an impression of you (e.g., super confident, almost preachy). Later I met you in person and realized -- whoa! -- my impression was wrong. You're a sweet, deep, interesting person who listens. All traits I value. The image you projected here differed from that. Which isn't uncommon: many bloggers show only one side of themselves online, the side they want us to see.

    I'm glad I got to know you in person. It made me want to become your friend. Past experiences (good and bad) have taught me not to trust the opaque window of online-presentation; I always need to meet someone IRL before deciding whether to befriend them.

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  3. Great colour choice for the pants, it looks good on you and to add, not many people understand about themselves and their emotions. So good on you for knowing who you are.

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  4. I'm glad you opened up and shared some of your feelings. This is a tough time, but on a happier note, love the pants.

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  5. Hi Tanvi - am sure a lot of thought and practical experience and learning went into knowing who you are in times of sadness and more so to be able to pen it down. It’s reassuring to read you don’t let anything illogical bring you down. I am on my own journey after what feels like all my adult life in a state of ... acceptance rather than introspection. Nice words and post ! ����

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  6. I am the same. Thank you for sharing this. If I feel anxious, sad or upset, I stay in my room for a day or two. Without food or any.

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  7. If there’s an instant “fix” for feeling sad, anxious, or otherwise vulnerable, nothing fits the bill like anger. This fiery emotion—causing you to simultaneously secrete adrenaline and noradrenaline—fortifies you for battle (though typically it’s verbal, not physical), and also anesthetizes you from the hurtful feelings that precipitated it. I may be wrong but this is my analysis of the situation

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  8. I am also very analytical and have to take a step back and remove myself from situation (or sometimes the world) to figure out what I need to do or what my next steps are. I also accepted that being vulnerable, anxious, and sad is part of living.

    www.rdsobsessions.com

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  9. Thank you for sharing this! I think many people share these emotions, including myself. When I feel anxious or upset, I retract from the world in a different way. I stay off social media and keep myself busy, cleaning, organizing, etc. Something I can control when I feel like everything else is chaotic. It's nice to get to know a little more :-)


    Lizzie
    wwww.lizzieinlace.com

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  10. i love your pants! cooking has become really therapeutic for me during this time as well.

    kileen
    cute & little

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  11. gosh i can totally relate to this, girl. thank you so much for sharing this here! we are definitely all taking a different look at life lately.

    xx rebecca // http://www.thecrystalpress.com/blog/

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  12. I am the absolute same way, I always retreat and just want to sulk until the darkness lifts. As we go into week 7 of quarantine, I've had to find new ways to keep my spirits up, one of which has been reading more!

    Rachel
    www.hello-her.com

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  13. I can definitely relate to the way you deal with heavier emotions. I tend to do the same thing, retracting myself from the world and holing myself up for a little bit until I feel better and more recharged! Nothing wrong with that!

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  14. It is wonderful how you opened up. I have anxiety too and always find thinking about thing out of my control makes it worse. Sending love during this time!

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  15. Today I am honestly all of these things. Today things are hitting me hard!! Need a break!

    xo Laura Leigh
    http://louellareese.com

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  16. So well said and I can totally relate to this! I've been stress cooking and baking a ton during the quarantine to deal with all of this craziness!

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  17. This is great advice, and it's true. Others can only do SO MUCH, and a lot of the time you have to dig yourself out of that hole and bring yourself back!

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  18. Firstly loving your outfit and yes I think many people are feeling this way - it's such strange times but communicating and talking ti loved ones is really important right now

    Laura x

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