Sunny Afternoon in Scottsdale, AZ7:00 PM
Have you ever wondered how it is so easy to talk to some people while with others, no matter how hard you try you can never really speak your mind? I for one am not known to mince my words. And when forced to keep my mouth shut every other part of my existence is "saying" what I cannot in so many words. So bottom line you would know how I feel about you whether I said it or not. Unless you are kinda-socially-dumb!
So ... for a while I have been in a confrontational mode. My logic is that if I decide to not speak up my true feelings then I cannot complain about people not understanding me either. Several months ago I messaged a friend saying that since we basically have had zero communication in the last year or so I am going to "unfriend" her as I do not see the point also because am in the constant need to declutter my life.
Then again I had emailed another old friend of mine explaining how I feel a distance between us and that may be we are not on the same page any more ... I am happy to report things changed, on both fronts, quite instantly. That's what made me realize that all I had to do was say how I felt ... and life gets better!
However, it is not all that easy every time. I have a bucket-load of people I would like to clear the air with, but I cannot seem to get around doing that. It could be their unapproachable demeanor, it could be my ego, it could be that I do not find them worth the hassle or it could be 'god-knows-what'. But I know it in my heart that I would feel a million times better if there was not a soul on this planet around whom I felt awkward. I would also feel a lot better if I was a millionaire and didn't have to work to make a living. But it ain't gonna happen, is it!?!?