Recently, one of my readers, Radha, shared this article by Chetan Bhagat with me, which got me thinking about another post which has been in my drafts for a long time. Who else thinks its about time I got working on the posts I have in drafts before coming up with new ones? I digress ... So where was I? ... O.Ya! Chetan Bhagat ... so here are my thoughts, not based on the same premises (stress level) but valuable nonetheless. At least I think so.
I cannot tell you how many women/girls claim to want to be independent and then do not do anything constructive about it. Personally, I believe the second most important thing for any woman should be - financial independence, first being - free thinking! One cannot ever truly be independent until they are financially dependent upon father, brother, husband or son. Probably till a decade ago Indian society didn't give many options for women to achieve financial independence. But today, that is not the case. It is not the matter of whether you "need" to make a living, it is a matter of that you "should" want to make a living and be able to support ALL your needs (and wants) from a glass of water to owning a house. Until you are dependent on a man for your well being, no matter how differently you think from him, you would never be able to take a step to make a change or difference. Food, clothes and shelter are, after all, the basic necessities and till you know you can cover them, you will never be able to break the shackles of dependency.
It is easy to get bogged down by luxuries and take everything for granted, till the day comes when you realize that you never took a step to find your own identity. And now its too late. For some odd reason our society idolizes the 'stay-at-home-mom/wife'. It is like they are making a grave sacrifice for their family and hence should be given the highest status in society ... but only in words! Thankfully, in today's times they don't have to sacrifice. The sooner women realize that, the faster our society will progress. I would even go ahead and say, do not expect your husband/father to shower you with presents, be capable enough to buy them for yourselves and may be shower them with presents instead (if they treat you right!). We say we want the equality of the sexes but a certain segment of women in society wish to be treated like royalty (by men) all the time.
... And the other segment of women wants to be the martyrs, the ones who will try and be perfectionists and juggle everything and kill themselves in the process. Quit trying to be perfect. It is never going to happen. You don't have to be the best wife, best mother, or the best daughter. As long as you are being yourself and trying your best, it is enough. Just like all the men in your life, you too have one life and at the end of this all ... there is no award for being perfect. There is however, the satisfaction of having lived your life to the fullest, if you accept that you are flawed.
So what am I saying here? I am saying that Indian women (myself included) need to introspect and be the change they want to see in the Indian society. I am saying that never quit your job. Not for anyone. Make your own money. Save. Save. Save. Enough to cover all your expenses for at least 6 months, for the worst case scenario. Treat men equal to you. Pay half the bill on your date. Open the door for them. Don't expect them to spend their hard earned money on you. Why should they? You wouldn't. Would you?
... And now keeping with the theme of the post, I just happen to be wearing an Indian(ized) outfit last Friday. No reason what-so-ever (:
Kurta/Tunic - Designed by Mom [13']
Jeggings - GAP [11']
Footwear - From Delhi [06']
Earrings - Gift from Sakshi [11']
On my lips - Mix of Rouge á Lévres Lasting Finish By Kate via RIMMEL LONDON & Raspberry Bite via REVLON
On my eyes - master drama by EYESTUDIO via Maybelline