Hard on Myself! | Indian Woman Fashion, Fitness, Food, Style & Travel Photography Blog by Tanvi Rastogi

Hard on Myself!

1:01 AM


One advice I receive over and over again (for the longest time that I can remember) is - "Don't be so hard on yourself!I guess I should be happy that everyone around me thinks I am hard on myself, but I do not share that opinion. I expect the best from myself. My goals, aims, aspirations ... they have always been 'to be the best version of myself'. Whether it was in academics or professionally, as a home maker or a blogger, as a friend or a daughter ... I have a certain expectation from myself and when I do not meet them, I am the first one to point it out. 

I think more often than not, I do a 'fair' assessment of myself. When I say I am not in my best shape, I mean I have been in a better shape, if I say I am not being productive enough, it only means I have achieved more in the past, etc. etc. ... and to expect anything less would mean a compromise or admittance of being mediocre. And God knows, I can be anything but mediocre. I'd rather not do it at all, than to be 'just-about-okay' at anything! 

Top - Banana Republic [11']
Jeans - Urban Outfitters [11']
Shoes - Ted Baker [09']
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65 comments

  1. i think it's easy to be perceived as someone not grateful for what they have like this...but I rather be true to myself than worry abt perceptions of ppl that I can't keep pace with...so I believe in pushing myself for the best in me also!

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  2. The best part is that you set your own standard and live up to it. Often we find ourselves trying to live up to standards that others set for us. And then being disappointed when we don't meet them.

    I think it's commendable that you don't settle for less. I would imagine it prevents people around you from settling for mediocrity too.

    Love your shoes :)

    Gayatri

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  3. I love the floral pants and the top :D
    The combination looks so good and super feminine!
    Love reading your posts when you write about yourself,your beliefs and your thoughts.I can totally relate to it tanvi!


    www.giasaysthat.com

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  4. There is nothing wrong with having a high standard! We keep on improving that way too right?

    xoxo,
    Chic 'n Cheap Living

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  5. I think its great to have that kind of attitude! You are your own competition and it makes you strive harder and harder.
    I love the backdrop for this shoot! It compliments your outfit perfectly. You should do a post on how you choose/hunt for locations ;)

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  6. It is always better for a person to strive to be the best he/she can be, of course, as long as it doesn't turn into an obsession ;-). Otherwise, we'd all be stagnant and stuck in a rut forever.

    Love all the green in that outfit, specially the shoes!!

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  7. I can relate; sometimes, my strive to be my personal best at all times can hinder new experiences. I feel like as I get older, the balance gets easier. I love your floral UO jeans!

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  8. Its so great that push your self to the max!
    I mean, you are the one who knows your potential and limits the best, so I think that you being your own toughest critic makes you the best you can be!
    I love the pink and lime combo - one of my oldest favs :)

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  9. I totally agree Tanvi. I push myself to be the best that I can be too. I dislike mediocrity. Why be mediocre when you can be great?

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  10. love your shoes and sometimes it's ok to give yourself a break

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  11. I quite like being a bit hard on myself. I achieve so much more.

    And so in love with the green shoes. They look gorgeous.

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  12. Nice post, Tanvi - I think your line, 'I expect the best from myself' pretty much sums it all up. Of course, one should not impose terribly unrealistic expectations upon themselves - rather, our personal expectations should serve to continually motivate and inspire us to perform as best as we can, given our circumstances.

    On a sartorial note, love the green shoes - especially liked the first image:)

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  13. Hey Tanvi,

    Your brand new follower :)
    I have been following your blog for a week now, and must admit I am in LOVE with everything that you do.

    Keep posting!

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  14. i love reading your blogs you always write gr8 stuff....ur fashion style is jus suberb...love love it...!!!
    p.s. thanks for dropping by my blog..if u like it plz do follow it
    xoxo
    Chic Accessorizer
    www.chicaccessorizer.bogspot.com

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  15. " I could be anything but mediocre"- very true...That is the way to live successful. Btw, i loved the peep toes- they look chic and smug:)

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  16. As long as we're living by our standards and not living up to someone else's then we're being true to ourselves.
    Love those green shoes! x

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  17. i can soo identify wit u tanvi..y didnt i come across this blog more early why???except that u achieve evrything u want n i sometimes dont take everything so serious only to fail at it and repent later..time to be more hard on myself!!!absolutely loveeeeee this post!!!
    n pretty outfit..i m soo fond of greens

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  18. Oh, those green shoes, gorgeous Tanvi:) Indeed, good to strive to be the best you can be. But, also not to take yourself too seriously and have fun along the way. If from time to time you fall, that is quite OK too:)

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  19. Hey, quit being so hard on yourself! ;)

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  20. I'm completely smitten with your pants!! I think we all can be our own strongest critic, but it most instances it makes us better.

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  21. i love what Vix said and i love the last shot.

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  22. I do believe you are hard on yourself as you come out perfectionist. AND I am 100% sure, you are very HARD on ASHISH to make sure he keeps on taking wonderful pictures. Don't be hard on him. Say my Hi to him

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  23. I'm hard on myself too but I'm trying to be a less so. It's hard though. Esepcially after years being this way.

    Love that look. The pants and shoes are fabulous! xoxo

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  24. I understand what you're saying. It's good to have high expectations of ourselves; they push us to greater levels of achievement.

    Afterward, however, we should relax and be proud of where we land. You are so farther ahead of others that, relatively speaking, you've won the race by a large margin. Take pride in that.

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  25. Great post - I feel the same way about myself too. Love the pants - very cute!

    www.whatjocraves.wordpress.com

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  26. Great post as always... I'm very much the same as I love living by the ethos of doing better or at least be a better person.

    Lovely outfit sweetpea!
    x.o.x.o

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  27. I always connect with every word you say! Better not be than being mediocre and that's how one should be, no?

    :) I want to try prints.... :D once I get this freaking job :| that I am struggling to find...hihi...

    have a lovely friday...*tomo*

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  28. Lovin the pink and the green. Nice mix. Xxxx

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  29. Tanvi there is a fine line indeed between being too hard on yourself and not hard enough. I don't know you personally, but from what I read, you seem pretty balanced and very self-motivated which is a great thing. I truly admire you, even if from miles and miles away behind a computer screen. Keep on truckin lady! I love your floral pants!

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  30. love them shoes!!

    yupps i totally agree with you...one has to satisfy oneself first and do good girl..being hard on yourself!!
    I say keep doing it..if it makes your own perception of urself good!!

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  31. It is so nice to hear from you about setting your own standards high just for yourself and not to prove anything to people around :)In love with your shoes..It is just perfect!!

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  32. I understand how you feel, I am the same way with myself. I always expect to be super productive with my free time and get all of my projects done; and when I don't, I feel mediocre. Hang in there ;)

    Great outfit btw, love the colors!

    www.thejoyoffashion.blogspot.com

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  33. you have a trait, that very few people.. you accept your weaknesses openly and really DO something about it.. it's a great quality.. But people around you would be worried right.. So please don't be too hard on yourself :)

    Love the look :)

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  34. I dont agree when someone tells me I am being hard on myself. I agree when I tell myself that (sometimes). Because only I know what standards I am trying to live upto. If you do not know what standards you are trying to live upto, the phrase 'being hard on yourself' does not make sense :D So yes, worry not what advice you get..listen to your mind ;)

    PS: drooling over the pink shirt of yours.

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  35. I think we can we can never be "too hard on ourselves" coz we'll be the ones knowing best where to stop if we can't take it anymore! (Did I make sense?)

    Being perfect about every li'l thing I do is second, sorry, first nature to me.......or else, like you said so aptly, I'd rather "not do it at all!"

    Thumbs up for always trying to be the BEST you can be......that way, we can meet our own eyes every time we look into the mirror... :)

    P.S.: I want those jeans........like, NOW!!!! <3

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  36. i get that all the time too. because you're right, i just expect more of myself. and then i expect more of other people and that creates a whole different problem. and i love those shoes!

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  37. Pretty outfit :) I think it's okay to expect lot from myself, at least on the things that really matter. :) xoxo

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  38. In general we tend to expect more from others than from ourselves.But being hard on ourself improves our living standards... Being too hard is not rite though ;) What i think is "Self satisfation is the real goal in any persons life."

    Anyways, i saw these jeans in UO, but picked colored jean though.. :) You look amazing and those greens are the real beauties :)

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  39. I try my hardest to be the same way! I love that trait about you. Loving your jeans and your hair! I love it all from a-z

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  40. It's easy to be hard on yourself, but from what you say it does seem like a fair assessment! I do the same.

    Love this outfit, Tanvi! The colors are just so gorgeous!

    -Ellie

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  41. My mom always say "You are your own worst critic." It's easier to see our flaws than our strengths sometimes. It's like going to the symphony. All you hear is beautiful music when you are in the audience, but if you were to ask one of the symphony members, they can tell you each mess up and bad note. Noticing your faults is normal and human and helps us strive for better...... just remember to pat yourself on the back for all you have achieved too!!

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  42. Awesome peep toes, Tanvi! Love the color. xo style, she wrote

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  43. I could have written that first paragraph. The advice from cbenavides is good. If you can't let go of the self-criticism, at least be sure to be happy when things go well!

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  44. i can say that you are an achiever, a perfectionist and an intelligent person... you seem to be easily disappointed when you have not reach your expected outcome on something that you've planned... sometimes we need to adjust ourselves to certain situations in order to be perfectly happy and contented on what we would achieve for now,, it is not bad to aim for the best but most of the time if we always focus on something, we never really see the real beauty of what should really meant to happen... i love your strength, its always an edge for a woman to be powerful in certain ways... love your outfit you looked perfect!!! enjoyed your blog.. following you now.. hope you could visit my blog too.. kissess!!!



    http://voguelyvan.blogspot.com

    ENTER MY INTERNATIONAL GIVEAWAY! WIN A SATCHEL AND FABULOUS ACCESSORIES! HERE'S THE LINK--> http://voguelyvan.blogspot.com/2011/09/september-october-international.html

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  45. You look super adorable and I adore your shoes. The colour combination is so spot on. Muah, sunshine.

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  46. I´m with you. More often than not, I´m hard on myself, and it actually pushes me to do better. But every now and then, I don´t forget to pat myself for every little achievement. It´s important to fuel your drive.

    I love how you pulled off that floral print trousers. And the shoes are amazing. :)

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  47. Absolutely loving the printed jeans... fits you so well. And the neckpiece adds up to the look, specially it's going really well with the shoe. Smart accessorizing!

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  48. those pants look fabulous on you!
    i think we should all try and be the best that we can be :)

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  49. OMG OMG! I love those shoes! and those pants are awesome possum! :)

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  50. Self-criticism can be constructive or destructive - constructive when you measure yourself against yourself and enjoy what you're doing; destructive when one continually compares oneself with others... sure path to unhappiness.
    Looking lovely, Tanvi, absolutely no reason to be hard on yourself :)

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  51. OMGOMGOMG
    I love the shoes and the funky chain.
    The outfit is amazing :)

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  52. Hun where your gorgeous smile disappeared recently??:(((( U look great, this is beautiful look, I love the pants and shoes, and blouse and everything but I really miss your smile...
    I hope u'll have a great weekend!! kisses
    Jelena (glamfabchameleon.blogspot.com)

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  53. As long as you are setting your own standards and living by it, it is a great attitude to have :)

    Love the shoes.

    xoxo
    Anusha

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  54. I loved your post. I believe it is all about being consciously aware of who you are and what you want in life be that your profession life or personal life, be that the life as a daughter, wife, mother etc. Once you attain that clarity you never miss out on the pre conceived expectations from yourself - pre conceived because they are perhaps inherent to every human.
    Thank you for stopping by my blog and for your lovely comment. I am glad you liked my post. Please do visit me again :)

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  55. Sometimes we all should not be so hard on ourselves and let ourselves relax. Sometimes we should just let it be. That is what I think.

    The outfit by the way is great. I loved the printed jeans which I initially thought were leggings. Great footwear too!

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  56. love the shoes and the pants.. and yes i also have this thing of excelling in everything i do.. my friends say that it puts undue pressure in me .. and i become worked up because of this...

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  57. I think I am similar in that way...for the most part. I think it helps me stay motivated.

    Cute color of shoes! Also those jeans are pretty funky!

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  58. Heart the entire compilatiion of your outfit! Perfect to the T...by the T! :-) Muah! You'll always be a GENIUS mere aankhon mein!!

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  59. i love the mix of colors you used here! great outfit

    Nadya

    www.thefiercediaries.com

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  60. So, here's wishing you always get to do it all! :)

    Love

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