Illusion of Perfection | Tanvii.com - Indian Fashion, Lifestyle and Travel Blog

Illusion of Perfection

Dressed for a dinner at home! 
Kaftan - Hand-me-down from Anita; Leggings - BCBG [09']; 
Juttis (Shoes) - From Amritsar [11']


I have realized recently that everyone has an image about each other according to their version of "expectations". We are all gauging each other's actions as per what we think is the right way to exist. It is easier in the professional world or where there is a book of etiquettes (provided one has read it!), for there are a set guideline to operate within. But in life woven with intricate relationships everyone is 'apparently' walking on pins and needles. 

Being an opinionated and judgmental person myself, I am not free from this disease either. But since I am on a unsaid struggle for life to survive on my own terms, I have started focusing all my energies on myself. I have decided to give up the illusion of perfection and simply live by being myself. Even the thought of trying to be someone else's "version of existence or expectation" is way more stressful than the actual struggle of staying true to myself. 

If it all went over your head and you didn't understand then do not worry about it, we'll hopefully be back to happy and merry life stories tomorrow. And just in case you got it, then 'Hang in there!' This too shall pass...

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48 comments

  1. KaveryFebruary 13, 2011 at 3:39 AM

    I think I got the hang ofwhat you are saying and truly being 'yourself' takes the least effort and is the best route to take.

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  2. nightflierFebruary 13, 2011 at 3:51 AM

    +1 for the post, the outfit and the shoes.
    What you said needs no validation. Be true to yourself and rest will fall into place.

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  3. ChandanaFebruary 13, 2011 at 4:30 AM

    Its a tough battle... We all want to 'be ourselves' but at the same time we want that to match the other person's 'expectations' and be accepted by them. Kind of a deadlock :)

    But in the end staying true to who you really are is all that matters.

    I like the way you styled the Kaftan :)

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  4. shooting starFebruary 13, 2011 at 5:11 AM

    it did go over my head!!....

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  5. HiFashionFebruary 13, 2011 at 5:34 AM

    Great idea! It's much better to live by being yourself and not by someone elses/society's version. I hope that's what you meant. If not, it definitely went over my head.

    the kaftan is really beautiful. I love the sleeves on it.

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  6. LeiaFebruary 13, 2011 at 5:42 AM

    Posing on the treadmill! I love it! :P
    It's hard to live up to expectations... everyone else's as well as your own.

    ♥ Leia

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  7. CinderellaFebruary 13, 2011 at 5:52 AM

    Trying to be someone else's idea of perfect is the shortest route to maligning the very essence of who you are and why you're here. I am glad you realized it sooner than later, I took really long to see this.

    As for the dress I like the kurti but the bling leggings dont work me here. I'd perhaps have a lil more blingy tunic n team it with a 3/4th legging like the one you're wearing.

    With the beautiful kurti that you sport here I'd have just gone for simple white leggings - or anything that doesnt take the focus off from the tunic. :)

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  8. Polka PrincessFebruary 13, 2011 at 7:44 AM

    Expectations! That mind-boggling, forever-disappointing demon!!! It's always best to be yourself.....& let others be too... :)

    By the way, what a lovely lovely kaftan!!! :))

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  9. raeyFebruary 13, 2011 at 8:21 AM

    I get what you're trying to say here..We get so absorbed with our own perception that we fail to see something beyond that image we have created in our minds..

    Anyhoo..The kaftan is GORGEOUS!!! & posing on a treadmill! NICE!!

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  10. A Lot Like FashionFebruary 13, 2011 at 8:29 AM

    Love love the kaftan! And the shiny tights *wheeeeeeeeee*! :)
    XX

    http://fortheloveoffashionandotherthings.blogspot.com

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  11. ShybikerFebruary 13, 2011 at 9:40 AM

    Smart insight. I'm glad you arrived at it so early in life. We should enjoy our lives and what we can make of them, not bemoan the impossible or feel bad about not doing what others want us to do.

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  12. UpasnaFebruary 13, 2011 at 9:44 AM

    living true to urself is probably the hardest thing to do...I try, and I guess I am more equipped to try now that I think I know myself better than I did...I love the kaftaan btw!

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  13. L1L2February 13, 2011 at 10:12 AM

    amen to living life in one's own terms. we do get bogged by the expectations and sometimes it can pull us to the bottomest pit no doubt! however, it is ur more subtle "this too shall pass" which should be in BOLD so life goes on... (with or without the perfection:) like ur kaftan btw, and hey, u r still smiling:)))

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  14. SherFebruary 13, 2011 at 11:17 AM

    I love that you posed on the treadmill!

    Well, nobody's perfect, and I've learned to embrace even my imperfections. Life's really too short to worry about other people's expectations:)

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  15. Vintage VixenFebruary 13, 2011 at 11:23 AM

    You're the first blogger I've ever visited who poses on a treadmill. Tanvi, you are a true individual.
    xxx

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  16. Inky PinkyFebruary 13, 2011 at 11:46 AM

    Why can't ppl just live and let live?!!

    Love the Kaftan btw :)

    http://huesofpink.blogspot.com

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  17. bhumikaFebruary 13, 2011 at 12:35 PM

    nice 1..pretty jootis..

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  18. caribbean princessFebruary 13, 2011 at 12:42 PM

    Beautiful kaftan! Be yourself! Never live to only please others :-) happy early valentine's although I know you don't care much for it! Hehe

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  19. Fashion BombayFebruary 13, 2011 at 12:58 PM

    Aren't hand-me-downs the best thing :)

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  20. archivesFebruary 13, 2011 at 2:01 PM

    agreed, absolutely. the older i get, i realize i can only be the best "me", and not compare myself against other people or their expectations. hard to do it practice, but worth trying.

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  21. *chameleon*February 13, 2011 at 2:02 PM

    exactly,i agree with u...only by being yourself and following your own truth u can give the most to the world!;)
    u look pretty!:)

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  22. Anita...February 13, 2011 at 2:24 PM

    I, Me, Myself.. always works...as long as we aren't being malicious or evil...seriously, we will never be perfect because everybody has their own definition...and i think our definition of OUR self is the best one ever! na?

    Kaftan looks so nice on you :-)

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  23. AnonymousFebruary 13, 2011 at 3:09 PM

    Um, I love that you are standing on a treadmill!

    And you are a very thoughtful person...

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  24. EzzyFebruary 13, 2011 at 4:11 PM

    kaftan is paired up beautifully with the leggings <3

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  25. TrophyBoutiqueFebruary 13, 2011 at 4:45 PM

    Just be you. Yes.

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  26. SplurgerinaFebruary 13, 2011 at 6:34 PM

    You can't make everyone happy and live according to their notions of perfection even if you tried...it's a lot easier to just be yourself!

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  27. Jahn 'n StyleFebruary 13, 2011 at 10:20 PM

    i think make oneself happy should be the only aim! anyway we cannot be in everybody's good books :):)

    btw...your Kaftan is awesome and the outfit is very nicely pulled together :):), you look lovely s always!!

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  28. cryskayFebruary 14, 2011 at 4:09 AM

    love this post and what you wrote. such great inspiration. btw, i love your flats! xo

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  29. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 8:00 AM

    You look lovely Tanvi...loved the Kaftan!!

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  30. Diana MieczanFebruary 14, 2011 at 9:43 AM

    Very interesting. I totally think that staying true to yourself is the way to go. Btw: Love your outfit
    Muah, sweetie

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  31. Vintage ObsessionFebruary 14, 2011 at 10:31 AM

    I love the kaftan styled Kurtha very classy , your leggings reminds me of mine in the same fabric but skin color , every time i wore it people thought i wasn't wearing any pants ,it was kind of hilarious :)

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  32. LiveLoveDressupFebruary 14, 2011 at 10:34 AM

    The Kaftan is gorgeous! Love the print!
    and I love how you write your heart out, It's a pleasure to read!

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  33. Chic 'n Cheap LivingFebruary 14, 2011 at 10:50 AM

    Always be yourself darling!

    Cute and casual outfit!

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  34. RupaFebruary 14, 2011 at 1:20 PM

    Hi Tanvi, you are a piscean too and now I can connect the dots.... I really agree a lot with you thoughts.....love the way you put them up on the blog....

    " Even the thought of trying to be someone else's "version of existence or expectation" is way more stressful than the actual struggle of staying true to myself.
    What you said hits the bullseye....feels great to know you via blogging....when is your b'day mine is on feb 27th :)

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  35. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 2:15 PM

    Kaftan is very pretty. :)

    And you know that I'm not very judgemental so as long as anyone is nice to me, in their own ways, I'm good. If they are not, I just don't care and pay less or no attention to them. :)

    ReplyDelete
  36. bollywoodstylediariesFebruary 14, 2011 at 3:56 PM

    Love the kaftan!! who wants to be perfect..being imperfect is waay more fun, no? jokes aside, you have to be true to yourself to be truly happy:-) Dont let them get to you!! come back!!

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  37. smFebruary 14, 2011 at 4:23 PM

    beautiful pics

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  38. Draffin BearsFebruary 14, 2011 at 6:20 PM

    Love your look and posing on the treadmill.
    I do think that we need to dress, how we want to and what makes us feel happy.

    Hugs
    Carolyn

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  39. www.majormusthaves.comFebruary 14, 2011 at 6:42 PM

    Great post. Love staying true to myself always!!! Did I mention you look spectacular!!! You do.:)Always.

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  40. shari @ little blue deerFebruary 14, 2011 at 7:46 PM

    So true..."Be yourself cause everyone else is taken!"
    Happy Valentines!

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  41. THE ALTERNATIVE WIFEFebruary 14, 2011 at 7:48 PM

    I just love your kaftan, sweetie. It's gorgeous! xoxo

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  42. simple girl.....February 14, 2011 at 8:05 PM

    great writing babe.. I am earnestly trying to be myself and have to admit that I am improving day by day ..

    P.S.- what fab kaftan ..

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  43. Style, She WroteFebruary 14, 2011 at 8:34 PM

    Very cool pairing that tunic with the liquid look leggings. xo style, she wrote

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  44. StaceyFebruary 14, 2011 at 9:06 PM

    Love the outfit and some great words of wisdom too. Hope you had a fab Valentine's Day!

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  45. Jasmine A.February 16, 2011 at 10:51 AM

    i think it's great that you're giving up that "illusion of perfection". a lot of new articles have been sprouting up lately about how facebook and certain types of blogs can lower a person's self esteem because they feel like they cannot live up to the seemingly perfect lives of others.

    two thumbs up.

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  46. TLFebruary 17, 2011 at 2:32 AM

    I couldn't agree more.. If you have to make yourself seem perfect for someone to accept you, then they are so not worth it!

    ReplyDelete
  47. MMNMFebruary 27, 2011 at 5:22 PM

    The kaftan kurta is awesome and looks very, very comfy. Could definitely be worn just by itself too...
    Meetu D

    ReplyDelete
  48. songbirdMay 13, 2012 at 1:17 AM

    i love that kaftan!!!
    this too shall pass has become a daily mantra for me now it would seem..

    ReplyDelete

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